To split or take turns paying? My boyfriend and I have been dating about 4 months. He is a few years younger than me and although I don't know for sure, I suspect I probably make more money than he does (not a lot more, but probably a little). Since we started dating, we take turns paying the tab when we go out on dates, and I am perfectly fine with this. I'd feel extremely uncomfortable expecting him to always pay for me because it's not like it's the 1900s and I am fully independent financially.
My issue is when we go out on the weekends with friends, the night usually ends up being significantly more expensive because it involves dinner, drinks, and sometimes an activity like a movie as well. It winds up being a lot for one person to pay all at once! Last weekend I spent over $100 when I joined him and his friends for dinner, drinks, and a movie. I only had $50 left in my checking account and had hoped to stretch it to last until I got payed today, but wound up having to charge part on my credit card and then had to buy groceries this week on my credit card as well. I'm trying to stick to a budget to save for a downpayment on a house. The next night he and I went to dinner at a diner-type place he picked, and he paid, and it was about $30 including tip.
Now I'm not trying to be super stingy and keep score, it's just that when we take turns paying it becomes incredibly difficult for me to budget unless I just set aside hundreds of dollars per month for going out. If I only have to worry about paying for myself, I can choose to do things like order a cheaper meal and not get a drink to save money. With the situation last weekend, it's not like I had a say in the plans. I just showed up to the movie and restaurant his friends had picked.
I'd prefer to each pay our own way in situations when we go out with friends, and alternate paying for only our date nights. Before I bring this up with him, do you have any feedback? If I really am being cheap or stingy please let me know!
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