You can't. Erase the number tell your bf that you won't talk to him anymore and follow through. Get rid of the guilt--it's not helping anyone. Focus on being a good girlfriend and moving forwards.

Unfortunately, you were unfaithful. Your boyfriend has the right to take as much time as he needs to heal. You cannot put any pressure or time limits on his healing process. However, you can find ways to demonstrate your renewed commitment to him in the meantime, by deleting the ex-boyfriend's number, ceasing all contact with him, making a commitment to yourself to let go of the past, and focusing your time, energy, and love on your boyfriend.

In addition, find a way to let your boyfriend know that you take responsibility for your actions, and that you will give him whatever time he deems necessary to get through this. That means no excuses or justifications for what happened – just accountability.

It will not be easy for you, because you will have to give him complete control. However, if you love him and really want to make things work – your commitment will become evident, because you will be willing to respect his wishes during this incredibly difficult time.

If you truly are committed to your boyfriend and wish to go forward, you must tell him that and prove it. That does not mean you have to give in on every issue, but you must, as has been said, delete the old boyfriend's number and not talk to him or meet with him again.

Under other circumstances couples can sometimes maintain contact an ex, but clearly this is not one of them.

Give him time, don't respond if he makes snide remarks about your ex and show him you are determined to get past this and make him trust you again.

We can assume that the number's now erased, right?

If you are TRULY committed to your current boyfriend, you should have zero contact with the ex you cheated on him with. Can you blame him for not trusting you? Even if you intend to be faithful, remaining in contact with this other guy isn't right. How would you feel if the tables were turned? Not good, I promise you.

Because you flubbed in the past, your boyfriend has the upper hand. It's now your job to earn his trust back. How important to you is this current relationship? Are you willing to sacrifice your relationship with your ex? Because that's really the first thing to do. If you can't/won't do this, I'm not sure how you will regain your boyfriend's trust. To convince him that there's nothing between you and your ex, there literally needs to be NOTHING between you and your ex - including conversation.

Dear Anonymous,
Imagine if the situation were switched and he'd cheated on you with an ex-girlfriend.
What would you need HIM to do to convince YOU?

I agree with Scott.

You might as well have 2 ex-boyfriends now because, every time you argue, this will get thrown in your face.

No sense in playing innocent. You aren't.

Axl Rose wasn't playin'. Patience. Selfishness is the cause of most fights and break-ups. You were selfish, screwed it up and now your boyfriend's hurting. Bad.

Your ex should be deleted from your phone, as he wasn't enough of a gentleman to respect your relationship and keep his pants zipped. Yet another example of selfishness.

If the Guns n' Roses method doesn't work, nothing will.

Oh, girl you have dug yourself into quite a hole. I have exes that I remained friendly with but when I'm in a serious relationship I cut all that nonsense out. I'm sorry but threesomes don't work and that's what you have. You are letting your ex into your current relationship and that's not fair to the guy you're with now. You need to take a step back and seriously evaluate your feelings for your ex, because there obviously is something still there. Is it love or is he a safety net for when/if your current relationship goes up in flames?
If you find that you really do love your current BF, then stop sabotaging your relationship. Devote yourself 100% and let the chips fall where they may.

You cheated on your boyfriend, and then you kept contact with the guy you cheated on him with. Methinks you're keeping your ex as a backup, and whether or not something is going on with you now, how could your current boyfriend not think that at the very least, you know exactly what your next move will be when the two of you break up? It's not necessarily a matter of "you aren't screwing him now." It's a matter of you not taking this relationship seriously, because you're thinking beyond it. And like Marguerite said, don't kid yourself. There would be really no other reason to keep that guy around if you weren't still feeling for him. The sexual attraction was such that it caused you to cheat, and you're fond enough of the guy to keep him as a friend. If that doesn't spell a threat to your boyfriend, I don't know what would.

So, basically, you've got to ask yourself if you are just passing time with this boyfriend? Or is he the real deal? If he's the real deal, then he should be enough for you, without the your ex hanging around. In which case, get rid of him but good. And if you're passing time with the guy, you've got to be honest with him. It would be cruel to waste his time.

Bottom line, though, to get what YOU want, you've got to really take an inventory of what these two men mean to you. Or whether you even want to be with either one. And then act accordingly. And remember, if you want to make it work with your boyfriend, another reason to drop the ex is to stop wasting HIS time. Because it's possible he's waiting it out for a break up to happen, so he can have you back. If that's not going to happen, you've got to let him know.

I hate to say it, but you may have done some permanent and possibly irreparable damage. You get rid of the number and the X and hope your boyfriend gives you another shot. If it were me, I wouldn't , would you? Or would you?

There is no convincing him. You are faced with a choice - delete the number and try to patch things up with your man or keep the ex and kiss your man goodbye. I think the choice is clear.

Now that you know what you need to do in order to patch things up with your boyfriend (get rid of the X entirely, 100%, no turning back EVER), then I suggest giving him the space he needs. Perhaps once he sees that you're dedicated to erasing the source of the biggest problem in your relationship then he'll start believing you. Can't blame him for not, though. He probably feels like an idiot. Quit playing games with his heart and choose him instead of halfassing it.

Amendment: I meant Blondie when I said, "Like Marguerite said..." But I agree with Marguerite as well.

Let your boyfriend go so he can find someone who truly loves him.

You don't.

Why do you still have your exe's number on your phone?

you're obviously not over your ex yet or his # wouldnt still be in your phone. Anyways it doesnt really matter because he'll NEVER get over your betrayal.

By admitting you still dig your ex. You gotta clean out your closets. It might be painful to break up with someone you are trying to prove something to, but your not being honest and that is worse.